Tuesday, August 2, 2011

My heart breaks

I'll never, ever, understand why good women have to go through such insurmountable pain from the loss of their child. I'll never, ever, understand why unborn babies have to die. I'll never, ever, understand why good, loving women who want nothing more to have a child have fertility problems.

I obviously get the science of it. Sometimes there are genetic issues, sometimes there are unforeseen health problems, sometimes something unexplainable goes wrong. But it doesn't make it hurt less. I'm not someone with strong enough religious convictions to find comfort in the thought that "God has a plan for them." It may be true, but it doesn't make me feel better. It doesn't make me less angry for the mothers, or sad for the babies.

In 5 days 4 of my friends have lost their babies. Two of them were in their first trimester, one was in her second trimester, and one was 4 days from her due date. I know life isn't fair, but this takes the cake. All of these babies were wanted, loved, and looked forward to. Their mothers had dreams for their futures, and it's not fair that their dreams got ripped away from them.

I wish for a day that this kind of pain no longer exists for my friends or any other mothers. My heart goes out to my friends, I wish I could take your pain away. :( Rest in Peace Baby Aiden, Baby R, Baby N #4 and Baby Rory.

1 comment:

Sami Strohm said...

Having just gone through the very same thing, you know my heart goes out to your friend. Nicole, there are no words to describe the heartache, pain, endless amount of tears and anger a woman has when this happens. I will always want answers as to why I lost my beautiful baby Jason. I struggle daily with this pain in my heart, and do not believe it happened for a reason. I learned a long time ago that life is not fair. It is hard and almost unbearable at times. They say things like this make you stronger. And it does. But with becoming stronger, you have to suffer the worst pain and heartache you will ever feel. I hope time eases your friends pain, as it seems to have a way of doing. And nothing I can say can express the sympathy and understanding I have of this tragedy.