Thursday, March 24, 2011

slow down and enjoy the ride

The last couple of nights my girl has been waking up a lot, I mean - 3-4 times a night, which is a LOT. Yes, I'm tired because of it. No, I don't drink coffee. No, I don't get naps since she only takes 30 min naps. But... I haven't minded. It's not going to be like this forever. She's not going to wake up in the night frequently for much longer (in the grand scheme of things). She's not going to need extra snuggle time for much longer. So, for now, I'm going to enjoy it.

I'm going to enjoy the weight of her little body laying across my chest. I'm going to enjoy her little fingers raking my arm back and forth a hundred times. I'm going to breathe in her sweet baby breath. I'm going to steal a million kisses from her soft forehead. I'm going to find peace in the rhythm of her breathing as she matches it with mine. I'm going to smile to myself as she turns her head to the right, then the left, then the right again while she's trying to get comfortable. I'm going to savor this moment because it's going to be gone before I'm ready for it to be.

There will be days when she'll want her Daddy over me. There will be days when it seems she likes spending time her friends more than me. There will eventually come a day that she'll want to be around anyone other than me. But for now, she wants her Momma. And as tired as I may be throughout the day, I'm so happy that I get to be there for her and that I can make it all better when she wakes up and needs an extra snuggle sesh. I'll gladly snuggle-bunny my Bean, even if it means I don't get a full night's sleep. Because my girl doesn't snuggle with just anyone. She's not a snuggler. I'll take what I can get. And truthfully, middle of the night snuggles are sort of sweet; the house is quite, the world outside is quite, it's just me and her, and I get to watch and take in every little thing about her while she drifts back to sleep. And once she does... I softly kiss her face and lay her back down. Ready to come back to her as soon as she needs me.