I've mentioned before that Bug is not a great sleeper. He's getting better, thank all the things that are holy, but he's still not sleeping through the night. But, ok. I'm accepting that that is just who he is. It sucks sometimes, but I've had nearly 8 months of it, and he is who he is. I expect it when I lay down at night; I expect him to wake up the minute I fall asleep, and then I expect him to wake up every 3 hours after that. I don't like it, but I EXPECT it.
What I don't expect is for Bean to be sleeping terribly all of a sudden. Around Christmas she started waking up at 7 instead of 8:30. It was a sudden change that I assumed was due to her excitement about Christmas and Santa, I assumed her wake up schedule would go back to normal after the holidays. I was wrong. It doesn't matter what time she goes to bed, she's up for the day between 6:45-7:15. I know that that isn't that early, but when you already have one crappy sleeper, you want your other kid to keep getting up at 8:30 because you're tired, and want your sleep. News flash: when you're a mom it doesn't matter what you want, or that you're tired... these sweet love muffins you brought into the world now make all the rules and you just have to rely on coffee to keep you going. But her early wake ups aren't the worst part. The worst part is a new development. One that I'm smart enough to not assume is just some short lived phase. Whenever I assume the best, reality smacks me in the face and I'm stuck with a new, crappy, normal. So, I'm trying to reverse psychology this new development and hope that it doesn't become the new normal by accepting that it is. Got that? That sentence was confusing to type. But my brain is confusing lately, so... try to keep up with my nonsense. I'm sure by now the suspense is killing you, What is this new terrible sleep development?! you're shouting at your computer... You're on the edge of your seat... Here it comes, get your best mommy-advice ready because I need some magic ju-ju to help... The new development is nightmares. She doesn't call them nightmares, but she says she has bad dreams, ones that make her afraid of the dark (even though there is a nightlight in her room), ones that make her yell out in her sleep - usually just nonsensical words, but sometimes full sentences and sometimes just cries, ones that make her "not want to be left all awone", ones that bring her into our bed at 1am, nestled in between Jeff and I, where she tosses and turns and lays sideways and upside down and folded in half at her waist, and neither she or I are getting enough sleep. (Jeff sleeps fine, because apparently Dads have magic sleeping powers.) I always assumed (I really should stop ASSuming things) that kids slept great despite their wonky sleeping positions/movements, but every time she kicks or jabs me awake at night I open my eyes and her eyes are open too. She isn't getting solid hours of sleep, she's only getting 30-45 min catnaps in between thrashing around and head butting me. Even though it would start a bad habit, IF she came into our bed and just slept I'd let her do it indefinitely, but she's not. I'm not sure what to do... do I walk her back to her room and have to sit/lay in there for an hour or more until she falls back asleep? Do I invite her into our bed, wait for her to fall asleep and try to carry her back to her room? Do I sleep on the floor next to my bed? I don't know why she's having the bad dreams in the first place, but that's the issue that I really wish I could fix. I wish she'd just have sweet dreams and sleep peacefully in her bed like she's done for the last 3.5 years. When I ask her what she dreams about it's always about a kitty or doggies. She doesn't talk about them being hurt in her dreams, or hurting her, or fighting amongst themselves, so I don't know what it is about the dream that is waking her up but she's visibly upset each time. We have her go potty when she wakes up and she always pees a lot, so perhaps it's the urge to pee that's actually waking her up, but she still insists that it was the bad dream.
All I know is that if I don't get some sleep soon I'm gonna snap. I'm talking shaved head, umbrella wielding, crazy faced Britney Spears type of "snap"... not some funny anecdote type of "snap". I can't keep getting up with Bug 2-4 times a night but then only getting 20-40 minute spurts of sleep, while I'm being physically assaulted I'm in my own bed by Bean, in between his nighttime feedings.
Send help. Send positive sleep ju-ju my way. Send coffee. Send the Sandman. Something. Anything.
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napping narcolepsy-style because she's not getting enough sleep at night.
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